R-E-S-P-E-C-T

Hello children. The word of today is "respect." And this post is all about the lack-thereof.

Big Brother over here is getting worse. But before I get into that, let me give you a little update on that last post.

I guess I've sort of heard back now? But not really officially? It's all a little weird. However, I am way less upset about it than I was before (but mainly because I'm probably the least qualified of the people I know who applied, so I never really had a chance from the get go). Basically, they seemed to have found someone from the outside that they liked and kind of just stopped all of the rest of the hiring/interview processes they were still working on.

Please note, this is obviously my interpretation of things (and if you haven't figured out that is what this whole blog is about, we're in trouble here). So I really have no clue about most of this and I'm just filling in the blanks with my imagination. Fun!

Anyways, apparently there were others who heard back and had phone interviews and the like. And then others like me, who got nada. I wasn't the only loser! Hurrah! But it all seems to have just stopped at some point...either at the beginning, like with me, or after a phone interview or something... and nobody seems to have actually gotten an official "no thank you." Or so I think, based on conversations I've had. It's all very mysterious and awkward, really.

And then the guy who they liked from the outside fell through. And now they're reopening the position. And starting over from stratch? That's what it seemed like when we were getting filled in on the situation at least. But hopefully some of the really qualified people actually did hear back from someone the second time around, and they weren't just completely tossed aside (again, like me). Because that seems completely stupid. The people I work with are awesome (it's basically part of the job qualifications... go me!!), so not hiring someone who already knows the scoop and is good at what they do seems odd and not very productive or the most profitable. BUT HEY, THAT'S JUST ME AND I DON'T RUN A BUSINESS. Sorry, I don't know why I felt like I needed to imply I was shouting that, but I did and it's there and that's how it's going to stay. And yes, I still think I'd be damn awesome at the role, but unfortunately my resume doesn't scream that as loudly as I do. THERE. Purpose for the all caps. I'm so good at typing things together.

But really guys, how the crap do you get a job that you like, that you're good at, and that pays you enough to live off of??? I feel like so many people who have joined the work force in the past 5 years or so are just struggling to make a career and I can't tell if this economy has just made it impossible to do what you want to do and make a living doing it, or if people have always just sat down and shut up about their crappy unhappy work lives.

Because guess what? I. Cannot. Do. That.

Surprised? Of course not. This is why I write this stupid blog. (You're not stupid blog, I'm sorry! But I do wish I didn't have to keep you around so much.) Because finding a job is hard as hell, and then finding a job you ENJOY is near impossible. Which is precisely why I currently have two jobs... one that pays for my life and one that I like. UGH.

Which leads me to my main point.

Big Brother has struck again, with a lot more force this time. And it goes something like this...

"We will begin blocking access to all streaming media... Please know this is not a punitive measure; rather, it is meant to improve our individual and collective productivity by allowing us to focus our energies on more profitable efforts."

Well, shit.

And that was the proverbial nail in the coffin of my job here. Because I can't deal with this place without Hulu keeping me sane. Being bored makes me insane. Seriously, I need to watch TV while I work here or I WILL LOSE MY MIND. I basically already have, so imagine how much worse it's about to get!

Now, don't get me wrong here. I completely agree that having employees use company time and internet to watch TV is not a good idea for a business. I actually hate that I even do it. However, let me explain to you why I do, why I think it's ok... and not even just ok, but actually good... that I do, and why they are stupid to take it away (at least from me).

I watch Hulu at work like other people listen to Pandora or whatnot. I'm the kind of person that has the TV on at all times. While I get ready in the morning, while I cook dinner, while I eat dinner, while I'm falling asleep (though that's a new thing I've learned from someone else that I am more than happy to put an end to when the TV gets moved out of the bedroom shortly!), etc. Yes, if I had one in the bathroom, I'd watch it there. TMI? Sorry.

Anyways, I like having TV on while I do other stuff in the same way I like having music on. It covers up the sounds of other things that would distract me from my task more. Like conversations or weird noises in my apartment when it's dark and I'm alone and easily scared. So, at work, it's the same. Well, not usually the scared part. But with the way things are headed here, who knows if it's going to get scary! And I'm very smart about my Hulu choices. I watch crappy shows that I would never DVR to watch at home. I'm talking about The Bachelorette or Bachelor Pad or Masterchef (not to be confused with Top Chef, which is awesome and a sit-down-and-watch-it kind of show! I'm promoting you, Andy Cohen! Again! Let's hang out! With the Real Housewives, of course!). The kind of stuff that I can basically just listen to all day. And honestly, it completely helps focus me and keep me on track with work. Competition shows are the best, because they make me start working harder and faster while I'm listening. SO, this is why taking away Hulu is stupid.

What I do here is not what I thought I'd be doing when I got the job. Totally new concept to people, right?? No one ever has had that happen in a job before?? Ha. Anyways, I had a lot of expectations for this gig, and not a one of them has happened. Which makes me more sad than anything, because I see a ton of potential for a great working environment here. But the missing ingredient that would seriously make such a huge difference in happiness and appreciation for the company versus miserable boredom and slightly frustrated indifference here?? RESPECT. Respect for the employees, to be specific. THE PEOPLE WHO KEEP YOUR COMPANY WORKING SMOOTHLY. Oh, JUST THOSE PEOPLE. Sheesh. And this latest Big Brother trick is an prime example of how respect for the employees and the work they do is just not at all important.

My job is glorified data entry. I thought I'd be using my brain here (in fact, I'm pretty sure I even mentioned in my interview how excited I was for a job that would challenge me and get me thinking a lot). And I did get to use it while I learned the ropes. And then I learned them. And then I continued doing the exact same thing for over a year. No growth or development, just small changes that everyone made to the work process. And even better? There's no room for growth here in general. They embrace the fact that an employee's lifespan here is about 2 years, and then they find a new job and leave. And they expect us to get a crap load of work done everyday, with no break from the onslaught of tasks, just additional work added to your pile. Because people keep leaving and they don't bring in new people, so the jobs just get spread out to the already overworked employees. And WE ALL DO THIS. AND WE DO IT WELL.

So, on top of all this, they've slowly been removing all the perks I heard about when I first starting working here. First to go was the holiday party. Then smaller department parties/outings. Then breakroom items like flavored creamers and more than just one generic type of tea. And now, video streaming. There is literally not one thing here that makes it an appealing position anymore (besides the general getting paid that happens with any job).

And that to me screams, we care more about money making than we do about developing a great company to be a part of. Which is not how I think or work or anything. And yes, if you were wondering, being able to watch TV while I work was the one thing that has been holding me to this job and not causing me to seriously start huntressing and applying to places again. So, I think this right here, what you're looking at, is my breaking point. It's time to take things seriously now.

And thus it begins again. No, I have no intentions to quit before I have another job lined up (which, I just realized, would be the first time I will have ever left a job to immediately start another job, instead of entering a period of unemployment). But I will be actively looking for one now.

And this time, I'm looking for one that wants me there and will respect me as an employee and will give me challenging, enjoyable work that keeps me busy so that I don't have to watch Hulu all day to make my life bearable, and hopefully one that I love and that starts building my career! That's not too much to ask, right? Right??