So, I'm temping away my days and I love it.
I know that sentence is kind of hard to embrace, since it includes the words "temping" and "love," but seriously, this place has been good to me so far!
However, I am not here to ooh and ahh over my current, though possibly brief, employment stint. You will all be thrilled to know that I have been interviewing still, and I've got a good little morsel of a story for ya'll. Happy early St. Patrick's Day!
So, yesterday, day two of the temp job, I had an interview scheduled for 6:15 pm, giving me 45 minutes to commute north and be ready to rock and roll. They were actually great, because they agreed to stay around late so that I could come in without having to take time off of my second day in the office. However, I felt guilty doing it, since I want to stay where I'm at, and I couldn't tell anyone. So why wouldn't that be the day I leave at the same time as two of my new coworkers?! And why wouldn't we all be taking the exact same train north!? And why wouldn't they be curious to know what my confirmation phone call on the train was about!?
So, they both got off the train, and I continued on my way to the ever-so-discreet "meeting" I had just confirmed, feeling like a total schmuck. Awesome.
I arrive at the building and have to call the guy to let me in. He comes down to meet me, as I'm standing there in a purple dress with matching purple heels like someone out of Mad Men or something. And I shake hands with a boy in a black sweatshirt and jeans. Not only is he totally casual, but he doesn't seem to care about washing his hair, yet the side-swiped bangs make me think that's his most cherished feature. Hellllooo emo Pete Wentz.
So, I'm obviously excited. Ok, but seriously, having walked around in heels all day, the jeans were definitely appealing (not his, obviously, just jeans in general). The space was all cool and lofty, so things started looking up.
Until he walked into the conference room with my requested water... in a red plastic cup. You know, the ones that you see crushed on the ground covered in old booze and dirt at house parties. So, professionalism isn't really there thing then?
It continues.
I'm introduced to his associate, who seems nice enough, and we get started with the interview.
You know what I love? When interviews involve hearing a lot about a company and the position and all the perks and horrors of it all, while I interrupt every once in a while to mention my past experience and what I could bring. And what makes them even better?? When it is completely obvious that they are trying to sell you on the whole deal and not vice versa. Granted, I don't exactly enjoy selling myself to people, but isn't that what you're supposed to do in an interview? Yeah, things were going well.
Not only did they talk about all the horrible things that come from working there (the market is BAAADDDD, you don't really get paid because it's 100% commission, you have to work 10 hour days and you can't even leave for lunch), but they complained about things, bantered back and forth with sarcastic remarks, and actually mentioned that one person who was fired had been a bitch so it was totally fine.
And then they threw up the big, bloody, red flag. At least to little ole gay-friendly, feminist me.
"One thing we think it's necessary to warn people about is that we are not PC here."
Ummm.......
I get that being PC isn't always easy, or fun. And I understand that being PC sometime includes just being polite and considerate of others, and not swearing or burping or whatever. Oh WAIT. No, that's not the definition of PC. No, that's the definition of being a nice human being. So, PC means being considerate of others' beliefs and identities and all that fun stuff.
Or, as a fun little source you may have heard of called Mirriam-Webster puts it, political correctness is "conforming to a belief that language and practices which could offend political sensibilities (as in matters of sex or race) should be eliminated."
Yes, I looked up the definition.
That's how serious I take this.
Also, did they NOT see my resume, where I state that I studied Women's Studies and LGBT Studies in college?? WHY ARE THEY INTERVIEWING ME??!?
Anyways, I'd heard enough at that point. Especially when the side-swipe dude let me know that no one ever gets really offended, although there was one time when he did.
Ten bucks says it was regarding his hair.
So, they finally complete the 'interview' and I think I'm free to go home and get some sushi with the bf. Nope. Oh no. No, I need to meet with one of the partners now. Awesome. But, even better than staying to talk with yet another person, side-swipe continues on to tell me that this partner man is going to purposefully try to bore me and I need to make sure I look attentive. And then they left me to wait for the partner to come in.
Yes, I completely thought about, and even visualized, what it would be like to just get up and book it out of there. The conference room I was in was right in the front of the office, and everyone else was further back. They wouldn't have even see me go.
Buuuuuttt... they also had my name and all my info, and that's just shady for me to do, even if I don't want the job. That's like when someone doesn't ever respond to an email that's personally directed to them. Yes, I have specific examples of these types of situations. I think you probably figured that one out though.
Anywho, I stayed. And the guy came in and talked, for probably TWENTY MINUTES, about the history of the company and what the company is all about and so, so, so much more that I didn't care about. But oh, I was VERY attentive. I smiled, laughed, nodded in agreement, made sure my eyes were wide and didn't stray away. This? Is why I am an actress. Haha.
But guess what? It STILL DOESN'T END HERE! Seriously, it actually continues to spiral downhill. So he finally finishes up his shpiel and decides to actually learn something about me. He asks me where I grew up and we talk about how good Midwest people are.
Then he asks me what my parents do for a living. Um, ok? How does this pertain to me getting a job? So I mention my dad's company and start to say how my mom volunteers. But no, he jumps right into asking what my dad DOES at his company. WHAT?! WHY? I'm now totally uncomfortable, and kind of pissed off, so I give the snoozer my dad's full title (Obviously, I'm talking about President Obama here, which is why this is sooooo uncomfortable.). He says something along the lines of wow or some other remark that doesn't help my irritation, and moves on to asking more about my siblings and my interests and yadda yadda.
Meanwhile, because this is not over YET, side-swipe comes back in (later telling me he did so in order to break up the boringness of the partner guy) and the two of them have a back and forth banter of sorts.
Which leads to the next and scariest part.
Snoozer partner tells side-swipe: "I like her. Let's hire her. Let's hire her right now."
Internal Me: FFFFFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKKKK. Ohgodohgodohgod. Now I have to tell them to their faces that I don't want to do this, and they are going to ask me questions about it and I have to be polite and they may try to convince me and I just want to LEAVE!
Side-swipe: Well, we should probably get you in for another interview, so that you can sit down with a team.
Internal Me: Ohthankheavens.
External Me: Ok, great!
They then tell me they want to do it during normal office hours, obviously, since it's a team of people, and I let them know I'll talk to my current temp bosses and see if they'll let me leave early one day to interview. Which of course I'm not going to do since I have no desire for the position and my temp job has the potential to become a real job that I would probably enjoy.
We say goodbye, I book it out of there, I'm awkwardly stopped on the stairs so side-swipe can give me his card, and then I am GONE. An hour and a half later. Starving, crabby, and no longer able to do my 6 loads of laundry as planned.
Two days later? I send side-swipe a very happy-go-lucky email saying thanks but no thanks since I don't think it will suit my interests and I can't take on the demands of the position currently. Meaning I don't want to hear people swearing up a storm all day and offending their coworkers and living in an office trying to earn a single dollar.
And so, the now lukewarm job hunt continues. As I try to patiently wait for word as to whether I'll be working beyond two weeks. Oof.
Meanwhile, you'll be hearing more horror stories on the job hunt, I'm sure!
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